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9:17 pm 43,548 notes
1. The first time I kissed you, we were both eleven on the swing set talking about what it would be like to kiss. We leaned in, our lips touch, but we never pulled away. Sometimes I try and forget that you were a girl.
2. The first time I felt that tingle, I was thirteen. I was warm and I felt my insides shake. I was told that it was wrong to touch yourself—that it was dirty, but I couldn’t help it. I wanted more. That was the first time I learned what it was like to love myself.
3. When I was fourteen, it was the first time I went int war. In my armor, I always carried a letter to my mother that read “I’m Sorry. Open with caution.” I never wanted her to doubt my love for her.
4. At fifteen, I thought that love would find me. They wanted pretty, like a porcelain doll with shiny skin and a body to be controlled. That was the year I learned that I was never going to be “pretty” enough.
5. I fell in love with a girl for the first time.
6. Every time I would write about love, I always thought about making love, but I wanted to know what it was like to fuck someone.
7. At sixteen the school called and told you that I was not stable. I never meant for you to find out. I’m sorry, but you will never understand. I’m sorry.
8. I would make up excuses as to why I was never hungry. The lies became believable and my body was thawing. I felt beautiful and strong. I never thought that something was wrong.
9. When I was seventeen, I never thought that I would survive. The bruises on my heart were too much. I wanted to escape. I wanted to be a coward.
10. I will never admit to my mother who I want to fall in love with.”
— "Ten secrets I will never tell my mother", n.a
8:53 pm 100 notes
In need of cuddles and kisses. I promise to write you poetry if you do.
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12:24 am 17,289 notes
The 6 People That Destroy You
This is about the six people that have negatively affected me and made a big impact in my life. Each one if about a different person.